She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
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