OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
