Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
