he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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