obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I came so hard my ears popped.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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