He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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