haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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