i jhust puked up my retainher.
i barfeds in our rink
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize