garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
