you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize