walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
