is your mom at the bar?
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
i barfeds in our rink
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
