you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
