make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize