i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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