JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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