i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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