also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
