i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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