question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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