Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
did you just send me my own nude
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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