honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
