Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
