she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
