You just made me feel so damn special
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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