you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
