You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
