i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Randomize
