True but thats because hes a fetus.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
COCAINE IS GR8
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
