plz talk dirty to me
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
This is the high leading the old right now
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize