Its about making memories worth repressing
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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