Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
