Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
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