More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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