Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
