hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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