Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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