I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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