Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
