You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
