real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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