Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Randomize