my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
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