Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Randomize
