Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Randomize
