You don't have asthma, your pregnant
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
