i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
