chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Can you bring me the toilet please
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
