bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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