Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize