it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize