I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize