Last Night in British Columbia (604)

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long

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  wtf you measured my hair?

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?

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  Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Ohh that happened after I started to cry.

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